of the day
Hmmmmphh! what started of as jovial banter between competitive yet amicable entertaining contemporaries escalated readily into mildly verbal combat then a fire-some Nay! ferocity filled fest and finally an unanticipated flea feast, yours, near marred and mentally scarred, truly being the ultimate and seemingly perfect parasitic fodder.
Let me unravel this yam of catastrophe consequence.
Yours talented truly - ‘Well I have heard through the showbizzy grapevine that performing pets are rather passé my little rodenteee gophereee chum does this disturb you?
Passé pet performer- ‘Poppycock, why pets have been performing since time immemorial from ranting piratty plumed types, loyal canine collies with exceptional navigation skills to heroic but tear jerking unfortunate yellery canine comrades of wholesome youths, Why Lem I do believe you are displaying nothing less than the old greeeeen eye which does compliment perfectly your, permanently green from over envy, visage. You clearly harbour feelings of inadequacy due to my most obvious ' oooooh isn’t he cute' attraction factor, get used to it old green and envy riddled bean there will always be a need for adorable pets’
Your talented truly - ‘Balderdash why I have unrivalled powers of attraction and entertaining qualities to boot and I readily agree, as I would be a fool to deny the ongoing and growing demand for pets, for Pies!
My combative companion did then repeatedly did perform bodily self-frisky type manoeuvres in rapid succession.
Passé pet performer - ‘You have no chance you freak why performingpetsforyou.com is doing a roaring trade and daily there are the proverbial paths beaten to my door for my artisan skills, you should know they 'pass you by' on the way Ha! Ha!
Yours talented truly- why tis nothing but bothersome poison you peddle nothing but poison -----d'pies!
To which the pet did indeed perform Tee! Hee! A further succession of intermittent bodily tic manoeuvres why was almost worth receiving the offensive offerings to watch what was almost a sport.
Well yours chortling, truly felt I could have sported all day but of a sudden I did unwittingly partake in the intermittent feat and lo and behold there we both were, scratching, in surely ludicrous sync, faster than fiddlers elbows at a St Patrick’s day feast.
yours truly - ‘what devil magic have performed you menagerie mammal? Pies! Pies! Pie! why I’m riddled in mountainous Nay! fiery volcanic pink pustules you devilly spawn‘.
Passé pet performer- Ha! Ha! Ha! you clay brained clod tis only fleas and does serves you right, why I am surprised they want to feast on your mealy self‘.
yours truly - ‘Talking off meals, Pies! Pies! Pies!
I was by now without doubt unreturnably deep in a huff and did strop off amidst the no longer, I’m sure as I was host to capacity, infested rodentee rougue and can only hope that my retaliatory replies of Pies! Boots! Hats! Gloves! Bags! Lots more Pies! and even more pies! Pies! Pies! did drown his chortles and rodentee chants.
Now you know full well by now my fine friend that I try not to subscribe to shallow traits, too much! but you will also be in full awareness of my extreme handsomeness that is a necessary feature for my entertaining duties, well I now do disclose to you, I feared it was well and truly marred I did briefly consider an appointment with an agent of no win no fee acclaim but felt I’d had enough of parasites to last, why a lifetime. and the scars did eventually fade but due only to thrice daily applications of honey ed poultices applied by my mother dearest.